The Strength of a Woman
“A strong woman understands that the gifts such as logic, decisiveness, and strength are just as feminine as intuition and emotional connection. She values and uses all of her gifts.”
– Nancy Rathburn
The strength of a woman is awe-inspiring. You don’t have to look far in the world today to see incredible examples of female strength. Our history books hold a multitude of stories of the unique strength of women across every culture. Their stories are often quieter, underrepresented, or even overlooked. Yet the soft strength women carry within them should make you very proud to be female.
Feminine strength is very different from our male counterparts. Femininity holds a different kind of importance. Women have the power to connect with others, fostering an atmosphere of gentle encouragement. Women are natural nurturers, having the ability to make people feel welcome and safe. Women have a deeply rooted resilience that enables them to withstand the unpredictable difficulties life likes to throw at us. All the while being creatures of astounding beauty in their kindness, gentleness, and grace.
That is not to say that women’s strength only lies in soft encouraging tones. Women are also fierce protectors. Willing to fight and bleed out for those they love (literally, childbirth is the most catastrophic event that can happen to a human body, and yet is the most natural and life-altering event you can have). A woman’s love is one of her greatest strengths. Love ignores life’s challenges in favor of limitless devotion; you need look no further than a mother and her beloved child to see that.
How We Lose Our Strength
It had been my experience to note that while women hold all this insurmountable power within them, they don’t always see it that way. Heavy self-criticism, perfectionistic attitudes, and impossible comparisons diminish the spark in each of us. We are continually bombarded by inside looks into others’ lives on social media, allowing us to obsess and pick out flaws in our own. Trying to keep up with the latest trends would leave anyone feeling dejected, man or woman.
Each of us has an ideal image in our mind of how we are supposed to think, act, eat, sleep, breathe, socialize, exercise, and just exist. We pick apart what we see in the mirror. We compare ourselves to models, CEO boss babes, and our male counterparts. We diminish our innate gifts through self-neglect, not even allowing ourselves to explore our inner potential through fear of being a failure.
Everyone, man, woman, and child struggle with something. Be it self-image, confidence, mindset, or health. No one is exempt from the harshness of the world. We each have lessons we need to learn, trials we need to bravely face, and peace to determinedly find. None of that can be sustainably done unless we start to recognize our worth. Start to value who we are at each stage of life. Show gratitude for the journey, and believe we are worth the effort it takes to invest in ourselves.
You can get all the guidance in the world, read all the self-help books, journal every day, and see a therapist once a week. That all means nothing if you don’t believe at your core that you are valuable and important. Going through the motions of any wellness routine on autopilot doesn’t mean anything is sinking in and generating an effect if you’re not also practicing what you consume.
Getting Your Strength Back
Anxiety, stress, depression, and overwhelm clouds our opinion of ourselves. Self-neglect has an incalculable negative impact on our self-belief. Once you get into the rhythm of ignoring your needs, you eventually start to believe that’s just how life goes. You must exercise a muscle to keep its shape, tone, and strength. The same goes for your mental and emotional health. Being an active participant in your life, taking control of your decisions, and reinvesting your energies into productive pursuits help to mold you into that vision of your ideal future.
I have made the mistake in the past of believing my happiness and confidence will come later on once I achieve X, Y, and Z. Feeling so uncomfortable in my skin I expected my self-confidence to magically arrive once I lost some extra weight. I believed once I found my purpose my life would have meaning and make sense. That I had to wait to heal every single trigger and trauma before I could enjoy peace.
Being a few years into my self-investment journey I look back with kinder eyes. We can be so critical of our younger selves for not having the strength we possess today. But that strength is built over time and with many experiences.
What I have found instead is this:
1. Your purpose does not necessarily define you, and it does not have to be just one thing. Some of us find a calling that feels so deeply bred into our DNA we have no choice but to follow it. Others, like me, struggle to find where we fit in. The reality is you can find meaning in all stages of life. Meaning, purpose, and fulfillment can be found in the smaller things. Finding joy in being a good mother, challenging yourself to create community and connection, developing your mind, and sharing your passions with others. Your purpose is made up of little pieces of what makes you feel at peace.
2. Don’t wait until tomorrow to feel beautiful when you can do that today. Being 26 at the time of this post, I for the first time have felt the first sense of my mortality. Thinking back to my early 20’s I see lost opportunities. Shying away from compliments, downplaying my confidence, hiding from the spotlight. Granted, I’m still not keen on being the center of attention (hey introverts!), but I now have a whole new appreciation for my youth and beauty. It is okay to feel beautiful and enjoy each moment, even if you’re not exactly where you want to be. Beauty is a strength, it can be used for good, or to manipulate. Just remember you’ll never be this age again, and you’ve never been this exact age before, so just enjoy each moment while it’s here.
3. Healing triggers and traumas take strength of heart and a great deal of time. We cannot expect the compounding interest of an unhealed trauma to be solved overnight. It takes strength to show yourself kindness in the face of unresolved issues. Those issues took time to get there, it’ll take time to unravel. In the meantime, celebrate each step forward, and show grace to each step backward.
Coming back to your feminine strength by recycling your powers of thoughtful empathy, dignity, and decisive intuition back into yourself. Commemorate your achievements. Share your experiences. Enjoy being the loving, creative, and sensitive feminine soul you are.
Encouragement
It is so special to be a strong woman living an authentic life. Investing in yourself, healing, growing, loving life, and sharing with others. I want to highlight one of my favorite examples of women who exemplify the strength of a woman.
Marilyn Monroe and Ella Fitzgerald
Two women of the golden days of Hollywood, were friends and supporters of each other’s work. They showed the world there is no place for prejudice when two talented women decide to encourage one another.
Their story is a beautiful read. One of affection, empathy, and kindness. These two stars in their own right have gone down in history as having infamous talent known in their spheres for particular reasons. Their stories shine that much brighter after hearing how their friendship overcame the odds against them. These women stayed true to who they were, and were dedicated to living a life they could be proud of.
Their heartwarming story of friendship encourages me to see the best in people, lift other women up, and shine bright where I know I can.
Give their story a quick read here.
Final Notes
Life as a woman presents its own set of unique challenges. We carry our babies for 9 long months, we cramp and bleed, we face criticisms, injustices, and bad hair days. Through it all there is a place for humor to be found. To laugh and find joy even when we doubt ourselves. The pressures both men and women face can be great. We each need each other in this world to thrive.
I encourage my fellow women to find their strength again. Seek out that which brings you the most peace. Challenge yourself to take daring steps toward your dreams. Start building the belief that you are worthy of the life you want to live, investing in yourself along the way.
I welcome you to continue in your self-investment journey with me here on the pages of In-nested. You can find more support through the bimonthly newsletter from The Nest.
Until nest time,
